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Article posted December 16, 2011 at 09:40 PM GMT • comment • Reads 96

Intro paragraph for "Always Remember" paper.



It's important to remember the men and women

who fight for our counry.

Parents,siblingsaunts,uncles,friends have all died for our protection. On September 11th a horrible attack happened in America. Thousands of people died that day.We should remember the people who died that day.

Article posted December 16, 2011 at 09:40 PM GMT • comment • Reads 96



Article posted December 15, 2011 at 05:53 AM GMT • comment • Reads 76

This is my paragraph:



It's always important to remember our mistakes. If no one remembers, this world would still have problems. For example: if no one remembers to turn in homework on time, everybody would have a B or below. Not remembering could also affect people's lives based on who they are.



So, what do you think?

Article posted December 15, 2011 at 05:53 AM GMT • comment • Reads 76



Article posted December 14, 2011 at 11:31 PM GMT • comment • Reads 64

One reason you should always remember is if you have an assignment do it as soon as possible. The best time to do it is when you have free time during class and you don’t have anything to do finish it then so you don’t have to do it later.



Plaese give me some feed back.

Article posted December 14, 2011 at 11:31 PM GMT • comment • Reads 64



Article posted December 14, 2011 at 11:17 PM GMT • comment • Reads 81

When I hear the words “Always Remember,” I think of the holidays we have to celebrate our soldiers. I also think of the men and women who fight and who are still fighting for us and our freedom. We have Veterans Day to remember the soldiers who risk their lives for us. We have The 4th of July because of our independence in the United States.

Article posted December 14, 2011 at 11:17 PM GMT • comment • Reads 81



Article posted December 12, 2011 at 05:15 PM GMT • comment • Reads 73

It is important to remember because people had fought for your freedom and if they had not of fought we would be slaves right now and have no freedom so NEVER forget.

Article posted December 12, 2011 at 05:15 PM GMT • comment • Reads 73



Article posted November 30, 2011 at 11:39 PM GMT • comment • Reads 79

What do you do with your mistakes? Do you just forget them and put them behind you? No, you remember your mistakes so you don’t make the same one. Everyone does. If you forget your mistakes, you’ll make the same mistake over and over again. That’s why it’s always important to remember your mistakes. So you don’t always make the same. We, as Americans will always remember some mistakes we have made as a country.



That was the first paragraph of my Always Remember paper. How do you think of it? Comment and tell me.

Article posted November 30, 2011 at 11:39 PM GMT • comment • Reads 79



Article posted November 30, 2011 at 12:34 AM GMT • comment • Reads 67

These are the things we should remember yes we remember the little things like family trips, but we should stat to remember the important things things that happen like when the twin towers feel in New York. When the Japanese boomed Prole Harbor.

Article posted November 30, 2011 at 12:34 AM GMT • comment • Reads 67



Article posted November 10, 2011 at 12:47 AM GMT • comment • Reads 76

Ok well people who read my things you know this important what I am discussing about. Ok well veterans are very important to thank and to really remember. These people have lived to help save our country and we need to thank every single one of them. We are usually thinking we are fine without them, but truelly we need to be thinking about how they have let us live our lives the way we should, HAPPY, FORGIVING, and THANKFUL for everything we have. We wouldn't have what we have without them.

Article posted November 10, 2011 at 12:47 AM GMT • comment • Reads 76



Article posted November 9, 2011 at 12:43 AM GMT • comment • Reads 84

Always remember! We always take for granted what the troops do for us. They protect us and our constitution. We Americans have also bonded together as well. Like in 9-11 we helped anyone we could so they could be safe. We have to always remember our troops. The troops always serve us and will always protect us.



I would like some vocab. My writing needs to be more interesting with longer sentences and vocab. It can help me in the future.

Article posted November 9, 2011 at 12:43 AM GMT • comment • Reads 84



Article posted November 8, 2011 at 03:07 AM GMT • comment • Reads 60

In my Hummanites esay I think my strongest paragraph in my humanities easy was my introduction paragraph. So here it is.

We were left with question to wonder in our minds. Why do we remember? The answer is we remember because we learn from it. Sometimes we learn by remembering something that we did well or correct. Other times we learn from exactly the opposite and we do something bad and remember it to eventually make us learn from it. I have many things I remember that I learned from and so does everyone else in America.

Well, there you have it, my introduction paragraph from my humanities easy. It is so simple but yet so meaningful my easy is. I think this is my strongest paragraph because it is the only one without an experience in it. I also put a lot of work into it. All in all that was my strongest paragraph in my Why Do We Remember easy.

Article posted November 8, 2011 at 03:07 AM GMT • comment • Reads 60



Article posted November 7, 2011 at 05:27 AM GMT • comment • Reads 72

Sometimes when veterans come home they have nothing and need help because of what they have done to serve us. They have put their life at risk to protect us and keep our freedom. We sometimes give them help but when they really need it, they get nothing. When some get home they get help and they can live. Then they get less and less and less help until they are on the street and without money.

That is my 2nd paragraph in my Always Remember essay. Are there any lines that aren't clear? Is there anything that is too long or short?

Article posted November 7, 2011 at 05:27 AM GMT • comment • Reads 72



Article posted November 6, 2011 at 02:58 AM GMT • comment • Reads 173

It is important to always remember because we can lean from our mistakes and change for the better. Change can sometimes be hard, and even scary, but that doesn't mean we don't have the ability to overcome our fears. We all have a story to tell, a memory that we will always remember. We see and hear it every day. In a picture, a song, a news paper article. There is always something there to remind us of our most important memories. And we should never forget them, because they remind us to build a better future for generations to come.



Does this stay on topic of WHY we should always remember?



Article posted November 6, 2011 at 02:58 AM GMT • comment • Reads 173



Article posted November 4, 2011 at 03:00 AM GMT • comment • Reads 159

My strongest paragraph was the first because I spent a lot of time on it. Don't be too harsh!!!



Some remember the little things like that Saturday you got to spend with your big sis or that day you got to spend with your dad. Others remember the happy big things like college your first car or your first christmas. Most remember the tragic big events like 9/11, a death, World War 1, World War 2, Pearl Harbor. one thing we forget is to always remember.



So......? watcha think???

Article posted November 4, 2011 at 03:00 AM GMT • comment • Reads 159



Article posted November 3, 2011 at 10:50 PM GMT • comment • Reads 153

Our country is important. That's a big reason lots of people faught to protect it. There's reasons why we should remember the people who did it and what they did. I'm going to share a few reasons on why I think it's important to always remember what was done for us.



That was my introductory paragraph. Any suggestions on how to make it better?

Article posted November 3, 2011 at 10:50 PM GMT • comment • Reads 153



Article posted November 3, 2011 at 10:19 PM GMT • comment • Reads 103

The human body is a complex system but the brain is even more complex than the body. It stores files and finds them as needed. You can eat foods that can help you remember things better but as we get closer to death, we start to forget easier than some people that are younger.





What feedback do you have for me?

Article posted November 3, 2011 at 10:19 PM GMT • comment • Reads 103



Article posted November 3, 2011 at 02:11 PM GMT • comment • Reads 72

Always remember, what comes to mind? Don’t forget, keep in mind, these are other ones. I’m going to talk about remember what you did foolishly, not right, and the veterans. So always remember this.

Do you see any grammatical errors?

Article posted November 3, 2011 at 02:11 PM GMT • comment • Reads 72



Article posted November 3, 2011 at 02:21 AM GMT • comment • Reads 64

“A veteran is a person who fell in love with their country- for better or for worse- for richer or for poorer- in sickness and in health.” To me this means how he or she will fight and will do anything for his or her country despite the consequences or what other people will say.

“A veteran is a person who is willing to lay down their life for the statue of liberty so that her poor, her huddled masses, her homeless, her tempest tossed may breathe free and may enjoy life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.” This means that the soldiers that are fighting for us are willing to give their lives up, so that the people who live in the US can enjoy life and not worry about the safety of their family or of themselves.

“A veteran is a person who does what he/she must- in spite of personal consequences- in spite of obstacles, dangers, and pressures- for that is the basis of all human morality.” This means to me that a veteran will go through pain, sweat, and tears just to show the love that they have for our country.

“A veteran is one who gets a lump in the throat when he/she sees our beloved flag. One who will fight to protect our beautiful flag from those who dare to dishonor it.” This means that a veteran loves America so much they are happy to live another day and to get another chance to see the flag again.

“A veteran is one who pays their taxes, willingly; serves their country, honorably; and cherishes their freedom, passionately.” This means to me that a veteran is a true American who loves America and enjoys every minute living in it.

“A veteran is one well deserving of our appreciation, our love, and our prayers 365 days a year.” This means that a veteran is a person who deserves our prayers and is worthy of every single one.

~anonymous



This paragraph is my middle paragraph. It was a poem I found on the internet but I also added my opinion after each quote. I need feedback to find out whether or not it’s a good enough paragraph!

Article posted November 3, 2011 at 02:21 AM GMT • comment • Reads 64



Article posted November 2, 2011 at 07:56 PM GMT • comment • Reads 61

 





 


Here's my last paragraph,


We will always remember the games that we’ve won and the loved ones we’ve lost, but most importantly, we will always remember the memories we’ve made; good, bad, funny, and even scary with the people we’ve just met or the ones we’ve known forever.




It doesn't have much about Veterans Day, so that's why I need feedback. PLEASE COMMENT=http://!!!!

Article posted November 2, 2011 at 07:56 PM GMT • comment • Reads 61



Article posted November 2, 2011 at 03:27 AM GMT • comment (6) • Reads 78

I've got two things I need checked, or given feedback on. Think you could help?



It seems meaningless to remember the little things that happen in our lives. I have three reasons and experiences as to why I always remember what the people fighting in war have done for me and everyone around me.



Because of all of these reasons and experiences, I am happy to say that I always remember the little things, the big things and the random thing in between. My life is what helps me remember that lots of people have it a lot worse than me and that is what the people who are fighting in the war are trying to help with. That is why I always remember to acknowledge the things that have been given to me.

Article posted November 2, 2011 at 03:27 AM GMT • comment (6) • Reads 78



Article posted November 2, 2011 at 01:03 AM GMT • comment • Reads 95

This is the introductory paragraph to my essay.  Please give me feedback on whether you would expect that this essay would be interesting based on this paragraph.



This year we remembered 9-11’s tenth anniversary. Why did we do that? Every year we celebrate President’s Day and the 4th of July and Memorial Day and Veteran’s Day and other national holidays like these, but, why? Why is it important to remember?

Article posted November 2, 2011 at 01:03 AM GMT • comment • Reads 95



Article posted November 2, 2011 at 12:56 AM GMT • comment • Reads 66

My intro:

The things that I always want to remember are the ones that I will need to get by in a world of chaos. Like the little times when you make a mistake. Or the first time you get a new bike, or the times when your mom/dad come home from a war. You remember those because they mean a lot. Remember the veterans that have died to save our country. They save our country and protect us so we should be thankful and give them credits. Some things I remember vividly and still look back and smile at how un-aware I was.

Does it sound alright? Should I word it differently?

Article posted November 2, 2011 at 12:56 AM GMT • comment • Reads 66



Article posted November 1, 2011 at 04:51 PM GMT • comment • Reads 485

It is good to always remember because, we don’t relies the people out there in different countries are out there fighting for the place we call home. Some people do not know how hard it is to let a family member leave and fight for our freedom but, every second counts.

Article posted November 1, 2011 at 04:51 PM GMT • comment • Reads 485



Article posted October 31, 2011 at 02:46 AM GMT • comment (2) • Reads 78

This is my concluding paragraph, and I feel it is my weakest, I would definitely like feedback.





As you can see,veterans definitely need to be remembered. They get injured for us. They die for us. They fight for us. They put the “United” in U.S.A. So, I ask you this one thing: please, please, always remember!

Article posted October 31, 2011 at 02:46 AM GMT • comment (2) • Reads 78



Article posted October 31, 2011 at 12:34 AM GMT • comment • Reads 60

I think it is important for us to remember those who have done so much for our future. So, we should always remember those who have worked hard to make our world the place it is now.

That was my introduction paragraph for my Always Remember Essay for Humanities.

Please give me feedback.



Article posted October 31, 2011 at 12:34 AM GMT • comment • Reads 60



Article posted October 30, 2011 at 11:55 PM GMT • comment • Reads 67

As american citizens we must always remember. As my dad's former history teacher said, "If you don't remember it you're bound to repeat it." We need to remember the sacrifices of our soldiers.



Please give me feedback on anything.

Article posted October 30, 2011 at 11:55 PM GMT • comment • Reads 67



Article posted October 30, 2011 at 11:11 PM GMT • comment • Reads 58

I think this is my best paragraph. Please comment on it if I need to make any corrections. Suggestions are certainly welcome. Thank you for all your help.

At the beginning of every man or woman’s career in the armed forces they take an oath.  That oath is an oath of sacrifice. They will, if they have to, give their life for their country. I honestly don’t know if I could make that kind of promise. Even if it was for something or someone I love. The thoughts that must be going through that man or woman’s head, at the time, must be thoughts of valiance. They are probably not even thinking about death but merely of service, duty, and honor. That is the true meaning of bravery.



Article posted October 30, 2011 at 11:11 PM GMT • comment • Reads 58



Article posted October 30, 2011 at 08:48 PM GMT • comment • Reads 83

But something that we should always remember is the terrorist attack on the World Trade Center towers. Many lives were lost in that tragic event. We learned from our mistakes to keep security tighter because the terrorist slipped right past us in order to accomplish their cruel plan, but mainly, we learned from other peoples’ mistakes. We learned pain and suffering that happens because of violence. Hopefully, what we learned from the Twin Towers tragedy will lead to a brighter future. I hope this because we learned from our mistakes and others, so now we can fix the things that lead to these mistakes to happen. We also remember from that experience that we are strong, because we learned that the people of America will keep standing, even in our darkest hour.



I think this is probably my strongest paragraph. The only problem with it is that it is kind of hard to be creative when writing about events like 9/11. I would like feedback on how to be creative when dealing with serious matters.

Article posted October 30, 2011 at 08:48 PM GMT • comment • Reads 83



Article posted October 30, 2011 at 04:29 PM GMT • comment • Reads 62

There are many reasons why you should always remember. You can honor those people that did something quite worthy of remembering and learn what not to do. You can also remember what to do as well.

This is my conclusion and I feel like it is weak. Please, HELP ME!

Article posted October 30, 2011 at 04:29 PM GMT • comment • Reads 62



Article posted October 29, 2011 at 09:24 PM GMT • comment • Reads 57

I think this is my best paragraph, but I'm sure you guys can come up with some flaws in it...please comment!!



Also, veterans have made many big sacrifices for our country. Here is a question to think about. How many people do you know that have risked their life for some people that they might not even know? Well, all of the veterans have!!! The least we can do is appreciate them for doing that. Another sacrifice that veterans have to make is that they have to leave their family for an amount of time. Think about how that family must feel. The family doesn’t even know if they get to see that person again!!! That is a very big sacrifice that we definitely need to appreciate. Also, the veterans did not have to do what they did. They have other options like being a teacher, or many other job choices out there. The veterans are very generous, and that is the main reason we need to remember them.

Article posted October 29, 2011 at 09:24 PM GMT • comment • Reads 57



Article posted October 29, 2011 at 06:06 PM GMT • comment • Reads 70

Considering their service we must show our awareness. Thank them or show some sort of affection. These people have given up their lives and now it is time for us to give our time to thank them and organize special things for them so we can give somewhat back to them. Former President John F. Kennedy said, "As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them." We must recognize these words and like he said live by them. Living by such words means much more to the veterans and will abide in their hearts much longer.



Hope you like it!

Article posted October 29, 2011 at 06:06 PM GMT • comment • Reads 70



Article posted October 29, 2011 at 05:44 PM GMT • comment • Reads 77

I love how we had to answer the question "Why is it important to remember?" I think that my strongest paragraph was my conclusion so once you read this I would appreciate it if you would give some feedback. Here it is:

It is good to always remember anything tragic or good in life like 9/11, World War II, and the people who defend our country. By remembering the ups and downs in life helps us remember what is most important in life: FAMILY. Also it always takes a tragedy to happen to refocus us on our loved ones. I encourage you to always remember!

Article posted October 29, 2011 at 05:44 PM GMT • comment • Reads 77



Article posted October 29, 2011 at 03:02 PM GMT • comment • Reads 126

We need to always remember the people who fought for us in so many wars and in other times when we were in need. For example the bombing of Pearl Harbor. We didn't just sit there and mope we went out and did the same time. Now here are some things i always remembered.

I remember when I didn't listen to what my dad said. I was fishing in the UP "Upper Peninsula". I had just caught a huge fish. As I was amazed at the monster, I heard my Dad say,"Ok lets put the fish in the cooler now". I didn't listen; I was too amazed at the fish. As soon as I said that the fish flopped out of my hands and into the water. I was so sad that, that had just happened to me.



I there anything I need to change?

Article posted October 29, 2011 at 03:02 PM GMT • comment • Reads 126



Article posted October 29, 2011 at 04:33 AM GMT • comment • Reads 111

We must always  remember those who laid down their own lives to protect this nation. Many lives were lost and many will be. Even though these proud people will risk their lives, they risk them with honor. These people are defendants of justice and liberty. They believe that they can make a difference, and they do. These people are the Army. 

Please give me feedback.

Article posted October 29, 2011 at 04:33 AM GMT • comment • Reads 111



Article posted October 29, 2011 at 02:36 AM GMT • comment • Reads 84

 



   This is my weakest paragraph. Can you please give me feed back.


We should always remember the tragedy of 9/11 ten years ago. During 9/11, lots of firemen, citizens and policemen died either saving other’s lives or doing their normal jobs. Throughout this experience, our country learned to always be aware of what’s around you. Therefore, whenever I cross the road, I need to be aware if there are any cars coming. Once I rode my bike into the street without looking and a car had to slam on their brakes to avoid hitting me. We should always remember 9/11 because of all the people that lost their lives and because it has taught us that we must be aware.  

Article posted October 29, 2011 at 02:36 AM GMT • comment • Reads 84



Article posted October 28, 2011 at 10:34 PM GMT • comment • Reads 59

I'm not good at conclusions so help me!



It is very important for everybody to remember the moments that are life lessons and to lean from them. Even if they're bad still remember them but focus on good moments the most because life is too short to focus on the negative.

Article posted October 28, 2011 at 10:34 PM GMT • comment • Reads 59



Article posted October 28, 2011 at 03:18 PM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 81

Honor is a huge part of remembering. You need to have empathy for the vetrens. Empathy is you put yourself in thier shoes.





Well, what do you think? Feedback please :)

Article posted October 28, 2011 at 03:18 PM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 81



Article posted October 28, 2011 at 04:03 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 87

Throughout the existence of the the human race, It's become rather apparent we have to work for freedom. Since there always seems to be someone interested in with holding the right to freedom, It makes securing it all the much more difficult.



I know it's a little on the short side, but I find it hard to keep an opening going.

Article posted October 28, 2011 at 04:03 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 87



Article posted October 28, 2011 at 04:02 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 56

Here's my introductry:

Have you ever forgotten what should always be remembered? Most Americans will never forget 9/11, the troops, and the day we got our independence.We will never forget these days for many good and bad reasons.

Please help me improve this paragraph.

Article posted October 28, 2011 at 04:02 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 56



Article posted October 28, 2011 at 03:30 AM GMT • comment • Reads 57

Veterans Day is a great opportunity to honor past and present servicemen and women. We need to remember those who risked their lives to fight for our freedoms. It is important to honor and thank them for their service. The people who fight for our freedoms could be our best friend or someone we don’t even know. These brave men and women sacrifice a lot for us even if they don’t know us. This is why veterans need to be honored on Veterans Day.



How's this?or?

Article posted October 28, 2011 at 03:30 AM GMT • comment • Reads 57



Article posted October 28, 2011 at 03:13 AM GMT • comment (2) • Reads 72

“Always remember. What does that mean? It means always remember the sacrifices our country has made, remember the history, remember the consequences. Remember the mistakes we have made, so we don’t do them again. THAT’S why we never forget…”



That’s my intro paragraph. PLEASE COMMENT!!! I haven’t gotten ANY comments yet on ANY of my posts! It’s sort of sad, actually…please comment!!! Pretty pretty please!!! Thanks!



Article posted October 28, 2011 at 03:13 AM GMT • comment (2) • Reads 72



Article posted October 28, 2011 at 03:02 AM GMT • comment • Reads 104

As time flies we seem to forget minor details, but, we don’t forget life lessons. Those are imprinted in our minds like a branding iron to a cow. Once we die the memories decompose, like the cow. But you must also remember all the hard work of a lot of people to make your life what it is today. Even if you haven’t witnessed it you need to appreciate it. Remember that and all of the people that shaped this world to its current form will feel an enlightening force within their soul.



 



That was my topic paragraph, how do you like it? Please tell me if it made sense or not.



Article posted October 28, 2011 at 03:02 AM GMT • comment • Reads 104



Article posted October 28, 2011 at 02:36 AM GMT • comment • Reads 67

My strongest paragraph is:



I have had the pleasure of meeting some of our contry's heroes. Speaking with them is a once in a life time experience. They could recall the events in such detail as though it happened yesterday.Their descriptions are better then anything you can read in any book. They are walking history lessns.



Please leave comments on my writing!

Article posted October 28, 2011 at 02:36 AM GMT • comment • Reads 67



Article posted October 28, 2011 at 01:52 AM GMT • comment • Reads 65

Im going to share my introductory paragraph! Please give me feedback.



" Why is it important to always remember? A good reason to always remember is because it teaches you something important about the past or when you make a mistake. For example, when you touch a very hot stove, you remember to be more observant and careful all the time. Another example would be a patriotic holiday like Veterans Day. It celebrates our soldiers fighting for our country and putting their lives at risk for ours. This holiday teaches us to appreciate what these great men and women have done for our country."



The End!

Article posted October 28, 2011 at 01:52 AM GMT • comment • Reads 65



Article posted October 28, 2011 at 12:10 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 52

Our veterans need to be remembered. They are the heroes of our country, a thick line of defense. Without them, we would be part of England, or even part of Japan. Those two examples are just a fraction of reasons why we need to always remember our veterans.

The feedback I'm looking for is my wording in the sentences. If it makes sense and is understandable.

Article posted October 28, 2011 at 12:10 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 52



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 11:11 PM GMT • comment • Reads 67

When ever you see a veteran be sure to say "thank you." The United States veterans served our country. They are the people who slept in the dirt and woke up to gun fires. Veterans did extremely dangerous things to protect the U.S. citizens. They took their time to fight for us. They left their own families to go live in different countries for many months at a time.

I hope the feedback I get is good.  Paragraph #2

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 11:11 PM GMT • comment • Reads 67



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 11:04 PM GMT • comment • Reads 47

Please give me feedback.



I think that we can always rememer what the troups have done for us. Just think about it I mean they killed the terrist and I just think some times we can be ungrateful I always think that I am grateful for the food that is on my table and how we can play sports all the time.

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 11:04 PM GMT • comment • Reads 47



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 10:44 PM GMT • comment • Reads 73

Hey guys! Please give me feedback on this paragraph from my essay. It is the introduction.



Every time I see a soldier in uniform, I remember that I live in America, a land of freedom. What soldiers do for the country and its citizens is braver and more compassionate than anything I could ever dream of doing. They go to war knowing that they might not come home. That is why we honor our veterans every year. The soldiers come home heroes. People that we respect, thank, and remember.

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 10:44 PM GMT • comment • Reads 73



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 02:27 PM GMT • comment • Reads 58

This is my introductory sentence:

Why should we remember? We can’t forget so that we don’t make the same mistake again. We want to remember the people in the military. We want to appreciate them and thank them for what they did for our country and other people’s countries. Three reasons that occurred to me that I will never forget are when I broke my nose, when my little sister’s diaper leaked onto my flute case, and when I fell in the halls.



How is it? any thing I can improve on? Please respond to my paragraph.

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 02:27 PM GMT • comment • Reads 58



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 02:03 PM GMT • comment • Reads 67

We all know that Veterans Day is coming up so we will remember those that fought for our freedom. We must reember the wars, those that served and the volunteers. Yet events like Nine Eleven and the war that followed might be tragic but they bond us together as a country.



That is my intro paragraph. What do you think I should change about my intro and topics?

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 02:03 PM GMT • comment • Reads 67



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 06:07 AM GMT • comment • Reads 98

In our world, we tend to solve conflicts between countries by fighting. It is unnecessary and unhelpful. Sadly, even though it’s unnecessary, wars happen. Instead of having peace and gratitude and solving our problems as a world together, we resort to violence. Thus, as you might expect, people, innocent, brave people, die in these wars. But they can’t be forgotten. They will never be forgotten. That is why we must always remember.

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 06:07 AM GMT • comment • Reads 98



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 04:32 AM GMT • comment (2) • Reads 54

This is the introduction to my essay. Enjoy!



There is a saying that states “forgive and forget”. Just forgive the person that did you wrong and forget all about it. This, however, is not always the case. In many situations, it is more important to remember. Remembering instead of forgetting can help with anything from respecting others to staying out of harm’s way. Remembering can be a whole lot more important than “forgiving and forgetting”.



I am eager for suggestions on this segment of my essay.Thanks!

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 04:32 AM GMT • comment (2) • Reads 54



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 04:13 AM GMT • comment • Reads 83

Finally, we should always remember our troops. They risk so much for us. They sacrifice a lot. Our troops fight in wars for our freedom. They risk and sacrifice so much. Without them we might not have freedom. Imagine your life without freedom. It wouldn’t be as pleasant. We should also think about people that just do good things. For example people who help the homeless and hungry people. Always remembering your mistakes is important, but remembering our troops is better. It is better because remembering mistakes may teach us lessons, but our troops give us freedom.



This is my strongest paragraph. Is there anything I should add to it? Is this paragraph understanable?

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 04:13 AM GMT • comment • Reads 83



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 04:12 AM GMT • comment • Reads 65

We need to always to remember military actions, or people who have served and are serving. We need to remember the people who have served so we can honor them and respect them. We also remember the people who are serving so we can honor and respect them as well. We need to remember our military actions as well. If we forget that we bombed Japan, we would forget everyone who died in the bombings. If we remember this, the innocent lives that were lost will not be forgotten. We needed to remember this so we don’t do it again. We need to remember the civil war so we remember that our country once wanted to be two different countries. If we forget these, we do these wars again. There are many reasons to always remember. The best reason to remember is so we don’t forget. If we forget, we will redo our mistakes. We need to always remember so we don’t repeat mistakes. We must remember our veterans so we don’t forget them. If we forget them, we will not remember their sacrifice. We must remember.

Please tell me if this is a good paragraph or not.

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 04:12 AM GMT • comment • Reads 65



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 04:04 AM GMT • comment • Reads 63

Please give me feedback:



There are many reasons why it is important to remember the past, but it is especially important to remember culture and history. Remembering helps you to learn from mistakes and good and bad experiences. As an American, it is important to take pride in our great history and remember those that have died for our freedom still to this day.

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 04:04 AM GMT • comment • Reads 63



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 03:52 AM GMT • comment • Reads 80

A good reason to always remember is to honor those who have died. It is important to remember them so they aren’t forgotten because without them we would not be who we are today. For example I always honor my grandmother that died on her birthday. I honor her because without her I would not be here.



Could I have some feedback on if this is a good reason to always remember?

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 03:52 AM GMT • comment • Reads 80



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 03:14 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 154

This paragraph I would liek some help with. What else should I write about? Here is the paragraph:

Once you remember your troops the whole world changes. Troops battle for our freedom and we should fight for them. When I say that, I mean don’t let anyone forget them. Remembering makes you proud to be an American. So, be a proud American and reminisce.

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 03:14 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 154



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 02:52 AM GMT • comment • Reads 58

Us, as humans remember things. We do many different things to represent what we are remembering such as having assemblies, making artwork, or even having no school or work. We remember things as little as getting in trouble with our parents or things as important as 9/11. This is an essay that explains why we remember.



I am looking for feedback on my first sentence. I want something more creative than just, "Us, as humans remember things."

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 02:52 AM GMT • comment • Reads 58



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 02:29 AM GMT • comment (5) • Reads 157

 



    This is my second paragraph in my story. 



One reason it is imperative to continually recollect things is so that you will never forget them. I recall one time when I was getting my haircut and I moved when the lady was cutting my hair. I moved because I was in a store where you could play video games while you were getting your haircut. I was playing a racing game and I made a really hard turn so I turned my body too. The lady cut a huge chunk of my hair off. It was pretty embarrassing. I never forget that and I never will. That’s why it’s key to talk about our veterans; so we never forget them.



Give me feedback.

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 02:29 AM GMT • comment (5) • Reads 157



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 02:02 AM GMT • comment • Reads 52

We should remember the people who survived in our army and who did not.Some people that were in our U.S.A army dont hae any family or friends.Some people who died family and friends miss them.Other people are still alive and not hurt.People who are still alive and hurt .We should remember all of them and what they did and are doing for us. Here is an example: one day I was in front of a store and staring at a homeless man talking to him self .So I shut the car door that was already looked on my finger.Thats what I get for staring at someone less fortunate than

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 02:02 AM GMT • comment • Reads 52



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 01:44 AM GMT • comment • Reads 43







Always Remember


Why is it important to always remember the Veterans and current soldiers? It is important to always remember the Veterans and current soldiers because of all they have done for our country. Some examples of what they do are when the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor and we fought back to make sure this never happened. Because we fought back this has not ever happened since. Another example is when we figured out that Binladon was responsible for the attacks on the Twin Towers and the Pentagon. When this happened our soldiers did everything in their power to make sure that we captured him and punished him for what he and his people did. These are the reasons that we should always remember our veterans and current troupes.


 


 

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 01:44 AM GMT • comment • Reads 43



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 01:42 AM GMT • comment • Reads 63

Here is my introductory paragraph:



Since the beginning of the United States, the people in the military have been protecting us. From all branches of the military, people have come together and devoted themselves to keeping America safe and free. Whether on the front lines, in an aircraft, or in an office, everyone who has been a part of the military has played a role in giving the United States the status it has today. Those who have ever served for the military must always be remembered. If it weren’t for their bravery, who knows where our country would be. Those who have served will never be forgotten, and for generations to come the U.S. military will stand proudly.



I would appreciate any comments that you have. Thanks!

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 01:42 AM GMT • comment • Reads 63



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 12:28 AM GMT • comment • Reads 76

I think this paragraph is one of my strongest.



The meaning of the American flag is something to remember it isn’t just a piece of cloth but has a meaning in its design. The stars represent the 50 states we have today. The stripes represent the 13 original colonies, the red represents purity, and the blue represents justice. The significant of the American flag reminds us that freedom is not free.

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 12:28 AM GMT • comment • Reads 76



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 12:22 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 97

Always Remember



Tragedy struck on September 11, 2001. The World Trade Center was struck by two airplanes and killed thousands people. Immediately the United States reacted with war against the Middle East. Millions of troops have died in a valiant effort defending our country. History has not repeated itself by having the all of the people of Muslims forced into military holding camps. Although, it has not gotten much better for the people of the Middle East because people are still more judge mental of them. It has been very hard for Muslim people and they will always remember how people have treated them. Always remember how easy it is to be judged by people for others actions. This country is very selfish because they want to blame something on someone else.



I would like to hear what you think about my paragraph! no matter what it is I want to hear it is!!!

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 12:22 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 97



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 12:14 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 66

One reason is to remember those who have fought in the war. We also do this to remember those who have died in battle for the U.S. This is because the families for those who have returned or died can celebrate what they did for our country. We forget some times that people are fighting a war. Also, we can remember who we are and who they are. If you could just think about it, you can realize that people work hard for America.” Activate yourself to duty by remembering your position, who you are, and what you have obliged yourself to be.” – Thomas Kempis can show that who we are and what we do should never change.



Please Reply.

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 12:14 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 66



Article posted October 27, 2011 at 12:02 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 77

I Know that we all can relate to something a veteran did or does. I'm not military but my grandad was. My great grandad was a prisoner of World War 2. I've got at least three good reasons why we should remember our veterans.



(end of introductory)



I would like to know if this was a hooking intro. Please give me your opinion if it was good. I would like to improve.

Article posted October 27, 2011 at 12:02 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 77



Article posted October 26, 2011 at 11:17 PM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 71

This is my topic paragraph:



It is near Veteran’s Day. We’ll always remember those who died in tragedies and honor men and women who have served in the United State armed forces. Many firefighters, policemen, port authorities, and civilians left for work, but they never made it home to their loved ones. Our veterans have given their time and risked their lives to serve and protect our country. Therefore, it’s important to remember that many have even died in doing so.



This is my paragraph that needs work:



We show our appreciation for our veterans by designating a federal holiday in their honor and remembering them. Veteran’s Day is a day of remembrance of their courage and selflessness. It is the least that we as Americans can do to honor our veterans who are prepared to give the ultimate sacrifice in order to preserve our country’s freedoms. Some military troops die in battle, and we are sad for their families. As life goes on, we rebuild and recover. We will always remember.



Those are my paragraphs. Please give me feedback.

Article posted October 26, 2011 at 11:17 PM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 71



Article posted October 26, 2011 at 10:46 PM GMT • comment • Reads 119

There are many things that will be in the history books that we will never forget. Everyone has things that taught them lessons. People learn from mistakes. I've learned a lot from my mistakes, so has are country. In the long run, it keeps me safe, out of trouble, and successful.




Please give feedback.

 

Article posted October 26, 2011 at 10:46 PM GMT • comment • Reads 119



Article posted October 26, 2011 at 04:39 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 53

This is my introductory paragraph. I want to know if it catches your attention and if you want to read more.

 



Always remember. Always remember what? Always remember Veterans Day? When my teacher told us to write an essay about Veterans Day and the topic was, always remember, the only thing that came to mind was the fact that November 11th is my birthday.  That’s a day my parents will not forget. When I think of my birthday I think that this day is all about me. The truth of the matter is that I share this day with all the many soldiers that died for this country and all the veterans that are serving right at this very moment. It’s about the soldiers who are returning from Iraq and Afghanistan just in time for the holidays, my grandfather who served 23 years in the United States Air Force, and my father who served 4 years in the Army. It’s about remembering the tragic events of 9/11 or the bombing of Pearl Harbor.  It’s about all those people present and past who fought for my freedom and to keep this country safe.

Article posted October 26, 2011 at 04:39 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 53



Article posted October 26, 2011 at 03:09 AM GMT • comment (2) • Reads 90

To “always remember” is very important. If you couldn’t remember it would be very different. When you remember you can learn life lessons or learn about something fun to do. Like the saying” you live and learn”. Everyone has experiences that change their life forever.



I think this is my weakest paragraph, what do you think I could fix?

Article posted October 26, 2011 at 03:09 AM GMT • comment (2) • Reads 90



Article posted October 26, 2011 at 12:51 AM GMT • comment (2) • Reads 56

    Now, why DOES it matter? How many people do we know that will give their life for you? They fight for us every second of every day and they will go out of their way to make sure that we live, even if it means that they don’t. So why IS it so important to remember veterans? Consider this one thing: do you like being free? Being able to go to church without sneaking around, and going out to eat pizza with your friends without worrying about an invasion? There are many reasons to remember our veterans, and our current troops who are helping preserve our way of life. Without them, where would we be? In a world full of death and misery? What about children? Would you really want them growing up in a place where they can step out the door and get blown up? We have a right to defend ourselves, and veterans do it for us all the time.



What do you suggest for this paragraph? What does it need? I think it's pretty good and well-spoken, but I'd like to hear what everybody else thinks before I turn it in. I have edited it like crazy and changed tons of stuff, and I believe it's pretty well thought out. What do you think, Kacie? Ms. Lubich? Do you like my writing? Is it good enough to win the contest?

Article posted October 26, 2011 at 12:51 AM GMT • comment (2) • Reads 56



Article posted October 25, 2011 at 02:59 AM GMT • comment (4) • Reads 74

  As humans their are some very important things we need to remember. A good example is breathing. Another is the men and women who fight for our freedom. What are some things you need to remember?



 Okay so that was my intro paragraph hope you liked it. Please comment on how I can improve!

Article posted October 25, 2011 at 02:59 AM GMT • comment (4) • Reads 74



Article posted October 25, 2011 at 01:52 AM GMT • comment • Reads 58

Please give me feedback!

 



My dad was injured in Bagdad. He gothis knee messed up, his back got fractured & now has a metal plate, one of his ear drums blown out & his head shook around. What caused this is the truck he was riding in hit an IED. An IED is a road side bomb. Terrorists put them in the ground, so it can hurt or kill the American Soldiers. My dad was very lucky he wasn’t killed. When he came off of the airplane, he had a cane to help him walk until he could walk on his own. My dad has to always go to the chiropractor for his back. Once in a while, these pieces of sharp metal would come out of his leg(s) because sharp metal was flying around from different things. My dad got a Purple Heart. The Purple Heart stands for, an American Soldiers who got hurt. He got his Purple Heart from one of his commanders. They have to wear their dress uniforms to put their pins/metals on. He already has a lot of pins/metals on his dress uniform. I’m happy to call my dad a hero because he fights for our country. My dad also just recovered from a surgrey on his shoulder, he pulled something & made his shoulder hurt really bad. Now, my dad has to leave for Anchorage, Alaska. He will be gone for 3 years. The really good thing is that we get to go see him. The reason why we all need to remember the veterans is because they had/have served for our country. They have done a very good job because they are helping us & themselves to fight for our/their families. The soldiers usually communicate with their family over emails, video chatting, letters, etc. When my dad was out in Bagdad, he always communicated with us over email. They are always proud of themselves if they save our country and made it through the war. God Bless Our Soldiers!!!

Article posted October 25, 2011 at 01:52 AM GMT • comment • Reads 58



Article posted October 25, 2011 at 01:24 AM GMT • comment • Reads 77

My first paragraph is as follows:



Why is it important to remember? Memory is everything. If humans had no memory every day you would have to learn your ABCs. Learned them one day the next day you wouldn’t remember so you would have to learn them again. Without memory the world would completely change.You should allways remember beacuse, what you remember determines who you are and what you will be!

If you are reading this please remember to remember the veterans who have died for us and our country. Also if your reading this provide feedback and tell me how I can improve.

Article posted October 25, 2011 at 01:24 AM GMT • comment • Reads 77



Article posted October 25, 2011 at 01:04 AM GMT • comment • Reads 50

Intro Paragraph: For many decades America has sent troops to different countries for many reasons. We always take for granted what these men and women do for our country. There are many reasons we should always remember how much freedom and security this country has.



Can anyone help me make this better, or help me revise it?



Article posted October 25, 2011 at 01:04 AM GMT • comment • Reads 50



Article posted October 25, 2011 at 12:32 AM GMT • comment • Reads 54

Always remember… Many people right now are thinking, ‘Always remember what?’. Why is it important to remember, you ask? Think of this large country. For generations, years, we’ve fought to keep our freedom, our remembrance, making our name legendary. Our country has fought many wars, some we’ve tried to stop, tried to ignore, and tried to save ourselves. Sometimes, it’s nice to sit back and remember our ancestors, our family, and our friends, who fought for our freedom. Many gave their lives, but many ask, for what?

Honestly I just want everyone to be remembering all the veterans who died for them, and I want them to be honored.

Article posted October 25, 2011 at 12:32 AM GMT • comment • Reads 54



Article posted October 25, 2011 at 12:15 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 56

I think thi is my strongest paragraph and I would appreciate any feedback given to me so please help me out.



People in countries all around the world should remember the men and women who have served their countries in the armed forces to defend their freedoms. In the United States of America, we set aside Veterans Day to honor servicemen and servicewomen who have selflessly sacrificed their freedoms to fight for the rights of others. Citizens honor veterans in silence, words, and thoughts in respect for their service.

Article posted October 25, 2011 at 12:15 AM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 56



Article posted October 25, 2011 at 12:05 AM GMT • comment • Reads 84

My intro paragraph for "Always Remember" paper:



It's important I always remember the people who fight for what we take for granted. There are people out their who fight who risk their lives daily for our protection, freedom and the making of a strong country.



Please give me feed back!

Article posted October 25, 2011 at 12:05 AM GMT • comment • Reads 84



Article posted October 25, 2011 at 12:03 AM GMT • comment • Reads 111

It is always important to remember our veterans who served our country because of the following reasons. The main reason is so that the lives that were lost were not lost in vain. Also it is important to honor the families of the men and women who died serving our country and protecting our freedom. Also we should never take our freedom for granted.





This is my first paragraph in my essay .What do you think? Plese give me feed back.



Article posted October 25, 2011 at 12:03 AM GMT • comment • Reads 111



Article posted October 24, 2011 at 11:50 PM GMT • comment • Reads 57

Why should we always remember? We get asked that question a lot. Well if you're asked that question ever, don't feel bad if you don't know how to answer this question. I am going to help you be able to answer this question. Some of the ways to answer this question are with reasons. Some of these reasons are Internement Camps, Concentration Camps, and 9/11. I can explain furthermore in the next few paragraphs.



I would really appreciate the feedback on how to change this.

Article posted October 24, 2011 at 11:50 PM GMT • comment • Reads 57



Article posted October 24, 2011 at 11:50 PM GMT • comment • Reads 118

Why is it important to always remember? It is important to always remember because you should save your memories. Saving your memories doesn’t mean saving old toys from your childhood, or having to take pictures. Saving your memories means remembering those important times. Times like when you made your first friend or had your first birthday party.

This is only my first paragraph so I would like to know, what do you think? Should I add more detail?

Article posted October 24, 2011 at 11:50 PM GMT • comment • Reads 118



Article posted October 24, 2011 at 11:44 PM GMT • comment • Reads 59

Please give me feedback.



It is always important to remeber those who served for us.Because if we didnt what would we do on July 4th? There probobly wouldnt be one.Then Irak would probobly take over because there would be no encouragement for them.But if we just didnt remember then we would all die,because if you forgot that getting shot hurts than we would eventually die,or be really hurt.

Article posted October 24, 2011 at 11:44 PM GMT • comment • Reads 59



Article posted October 24, 2011 at 11:42 PM GMT • comment • Reads 187

I need some feedback on this paragraph, it's my worst one.Thanks!



Another reason to remember soilders is ciizenship. This involves citzenship because for us to be able to remain a citzen of the united states of america, some of us need to give our services to the U.S. military. without that sacrafice those people made, we would not live as good as a life as we do now, we would live unprotected .



Article posted October 24, 2011 at 11:42 PM GMT • comment • Reads 187



Article posted October 24, 2011 at 10:31 PM GMT • comment • Reads 80

Why is it important to always remember? It is important to always remember because you should think about the troops that fought and lost their lives for you to be where you are today. These brave men and woman are willing to die for their country an any given time of the day. You may not think about it, but if it wasent for these people then you would not be here today. Just go home and think about this for a while.



Please reply with your opinion about this.

Article posted October 24, 2011 at 10:31 PM GMT • comment • Reads 80



Article posted October 24, 2011 at 10:29 PM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 77

This is the first paragraph of my Always Remember paragraph. I think that it is pretty good but if you have anything to say please comment on this.



I will always remember how I dad an on handed wheelie one my bike and almost broke my leg. I'll always remember that because the swelling on my leg was very traumatic. That is similar to when Pearl Harbor was bombed because it started a very traumatic war. Traumatic thing make you want to remember so it doesn’t happen again. So let’s hope that history has been traumatic enough to not repeat itself. This is the first paragraph of my Always Remember paragraph. I think that it is pretty good but if you have anything to say please comment on this.

Article posted October 24, 2011 at 10:29 PM GMT • comment (1) • Reads 77



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