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Part One of Meeting Jesus
Hi my name is Alex my friends call me Cricket for short (I think). But anyway I love school. You might think I’m a good student with good grades and good personality but I’m not. I’m what you describe as a bad boy. When teachers see me I can see the fear crying in there eyes. You might think I’m a horrible person but I’m not – “Cricket let’s go”! I heard my screw call me I ran towards them.
James asked “You got the stuff”. “Oh snap” I said. “I forgot it” I said. “Dang man, you always do this” James yelled. If you get us shot I’m going to raise from the dead and kill you myself!!!” he yelled. My gang and I aren’t close at all. We act more like rivals than a pack. We were like a dog pack. But I was the underdog, the weakest, the stupidest, and the ugliest. Compare me to James I’m worthless.
“Cricket!” I heard Shiloh call me. He had brown hair seemed to be black eyes and a super round head. On the charts of the group he was number 3. He told me I was stupid earlier. So I was sick of him. So right at that moment I slugged him right in his jaw. But it seemed to be not hard enough so I got one right back. Even harder than mine. “ Who do you think you are fool” he said. In fear I got up stared him up and down and left. But I was going to my side of town, so that meant I was running things.
Article posted October 7, 2011 at 08:06 AM •
comment (3) • Reads 988
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Posted Comments

So far what you have said was not really a positive story line and so something you could do to fix it would be, make the story less focused on violence or gangs.I think you did a good job making it dramatic and having action in it.
Comment Posted on October 7, 2011 at 08:26 AM by
MS


I kind of don't want to read more. Sorry but I think it has no point! I liked your vocabulary though.
Comment Posted on October 7, 2011 at 08:26 AM by
AH


I think this would be a very interesting story, but I think the subject may be offensive to some people.
Comment Posted on October 7, 2011 at 08:25 AM by
JW

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